17/1/23 Jokes

1. Im a good man, I give 50% of my money to charity
Except when she’s not working I give it to destiny.

2. In the beginning, there was nothing. God said, “Let there be light”.
There was still nothing but now you could see it.

3. What’s the difference between a cult and a religion?
In a cult, there’s always at least one person at the top who’s wholly crazy or knows it’s all a scam…

In a religion, that guy’s dead!

4. Every morning after I wake up, the first thing I do is make my bed.
I shouldn’t have bought this piece of shit from IKEA.

5. The Vagina
The best engine in the world. It can be started with one finger. It’s self-lubricating. It takes any size piston and change’s its own oil every four weeks. It’s just a pity the management system is so fucking temperamental!!